"I am sick and I am dull, and I am plain. How dearly I would love to get carried away, oh but dreams have a knack of just not coming true, and time is against me now."
I'm not entirely sure how i feel :\ i can't work out whether im annoyed at myself or sad or what..
I think im mainly frustrated with the fact i never give anyone the chance to make me happy.
ive always found a million problems and reasons why i shouldn't be with that person and then by the time ive thought it through ive ruined it, theres no excitement or anticipation of whats going to happen because ive already made my mind up whats going to happen :(.
i wish i could just turn my brain off sometimes makes me feel sick how much i over anylize.
“I don’t have a fear of commitment, I have a fear of abandonment. We all screw things up, I screw things up. Especially with the people I love. I get needy, I get moody, I get distant, I want to be too close. I get confused, I don’t understand all of it. But I keep pushing because I hope that in this thing, the universe, there’s no way I’m the only person out there who wants something this bad. If I want it, someone else out there must too.”
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